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Still nameless I guess

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I guess you could call this poem "Silver Tears", still doesn't have a name

Golder Tears:

Tonight I'll cry all night long
and my tears will become gold;
The moonlighted sky will be filled with my tears, and the infinite horizon with howls.

The wind will blow through my shoulders as I fade into darkness
The only company I will have will be my lurking shadow.

No instrument could ever play sadder melody than my cry
No void could explain how empty I feel
Ain't blackest lyrics as my thoughts
Ain't darkest place that my soul.

Along the my heavy walk I drag the chains of loneliness
Heavily armed with past memories, I walk through my mind
And I dance at the pulse of your voice

Laying in the floor, with smell of alcohol and nicotine I await your response to my call.
Cold hearted world becomes my house, and the air my cyanide.

My river drained as you left; my smile became a desert.
My emotions died, forget who I was
Empty, meaningless a body waits for your cold embrace of endless hours as I vanish.

It's 4 am and I have been crying gold drops for thousands hours, lost I started to rave while the night sighs my name. A dead view is all I've been gifted.

Isolated in the desert of the emptiness you left inside me, I saw an oasis... It found a couple and it left me dying across the cold of a nightmare.
Slowly, never ending agony starts to posses me.

The panic seizes my heart, as the emptiness does as well.

It's dawn and I've been drained, tearless the time future be.
The moon has given everything to us, and so I give everything for the night;
The night is dying, and I fade away with it.
Don't wake me up unless the darkest and deepest night strikes over this world again...
 
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its poem, you can make up words, and sentences, its not how its written, its the meaning of the written words
Thanks, I really didn't wanted to argue with someone who doesn't know what hyperbaton is...
 

RedTheFox999

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#16
Red have you never read poetry, it follows it's own set of rules from the normal everyday English that people speak to each other.
I'm not saying this isn't how poetry is supposed to be. xD I had to do one for a school assignment and it sounded really weird. My friend made a poem about a pencil tip. xD
he never left his room, you think he reads poems?
Oh really? Why am I at school right now?
 
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You're not inverting any words in those two lines.
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Taking the definition of the RAE (Real Spanish Academy, in Spanish) Hyperbaton is the alteration in the order of words, not "inverting two words".
As long I made this poem in Spanish, and translated it, I'm following the rules made in Spanish. (If you want I can give you the poem in Spanish, you can check if there's any mistakes;) )
 

RedTheFox999

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Taking the definition of the RAE (Real Spanish Academy, in Spanish) Hyperbaton is the alteration in the order of words, not "inverting two words".
As long I made this poem in Spanish, and translated it, I'm following the rules made in Spanish. (If you want I can give you the poem in Spanish, you can check if there's any mistakes;) )
Well if you said it was Spanish in the first place, there'd be a lot less messages on this arguing about poetry. xD
 
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